Pet Images. My Big Day!

Ok, so some of you know that I have been questioning for a couple months me being on the MOPP chemo regimen because I can’t be on ABVD because of bad PFTs (pulmonary function tests).  I have also been really concerned because I have not have a PET/CT since May 12th.  Well, today was the big day!  I had a PET.  Since I have a second opinion on Tuesday, they asked me to have them put it on disk.  And of course, since I had the disk I had to take a look.  Now, I have never seen a PET before, and I think what I THINK I am looking at looks effing awesome, but I can’t be sure.  The first image is my PET 5/12 and the second is today’s.  After the 1st PET I also listed the report that accompanied the scan.  The report isn’t ready yet for today’s scan.  Anyhow… So here they are: Read more

Not So ‘Berry Yum’

I’m sitting in this darkened room for an hour. You have to do that to prep for a PET Scan. They give you what’s called radioactive glucose, and after injected, it goes to anything active within your body. To make it not light anything up that shouldn’t be, you have to be fairly still and make little movement. I can’t even talk. The only movement I am making is with my thumbs (using my blackberry) - which they don’t scan my thumbs anyhow, so I’m okay with just that.

I had to start preparing for the PET last night. I was not allowed to have any carbs, no exercise, and nothing to eat or drink after midnight. Its after 11 am now and I am starving. I also had to take my first of three bottles of bairum last night at 10. I asked for the berry smoothie flavor this time, which led me to the clever name of not so berry yum. Get it? Barium/berry yum. Right. Anyhow. I also had to choke down a bottle at 9:10, an hour before my appt that was supposed to start at 10:10. Operative word being ’supposed’. Read more

Ants

So, I feel like I have completely abandoned everyone. I probably haven’t, it just seems like I have lost all contact with everything web. But the surprising thing is I have been on it nonstop. I have been trying to do a lot of maintenance to this site. Two months later, and I still don’t have it looking good or right. I have also building another website for myself and I built one for Terrence. I have also been spending all my time in bed, thank God for the laptop.

I almost wish I had Chemobrain again. When I had chemobrain I wasn’t feeling like I did this go around. I always feel like crap for complaining too, because I really do have it easier, I guess, then most people that endure cancer and chemo. But I still have side-effects and problems. But then I run into that mental moral dilemma about how I shouldn’t be complaining, or even thinking about anything I am feeling or going through because other people have it so much worse off. Sometimes I even feel guilty for tell all of you about what I’m going through here, because I shouldn’t be bringing attention to my “simple case”. Read more

Angry Tremors and Depression

This post is only to prove as a short very long (sorry, didn’t realize I had so much to say) update of what has been going on lately.  I feel like I have disappeared off the face of the earth.  I haven’t, I have just been not “here”.  Wherever that proverbial “here” happens to be.  I haven’t even done my “Chemo Chronicles” article for last Friday.  I will do that, but there isn’t much that you are missing.  I still want to get it down though just to get it documented - that is the point of all this anyhow.

I published an article the other day, “I’m Not Angry, I’m Just On Prednisone”, and then later that night published my very first web video, “My Nightly Chemo Meds”, which really helped me to chill a little. Read more

My Nightly Chemo Meds (Video Post)

This is a little video my daughters helped me make. I have a nightly routine of generally 11-13 pills that I have to take while on my 14-day chemo treatment. I got bored and decided to play with my crackberry and this video was born! At least it helped to ease my mood a little - I’m sorry about tonight’s earlier post - whew, that was a bad ‘roid rage session!

I’m not angry, I’m just on Prednisone. (Mad Rant)

Maybe this post will help me chill out a little bit.  I am on day…  (counting..) 11 of my 14 day chemo treatment, and I’m just grrrr.  I am so angry right now, and for no reason.  I’m fat.  I just weighed myself at 161.  My feet look like little blowfish, my pants won’t fit, my neck is sweating, I’m hungry but can’t taste anything.  I’m hungry but nothing sounds good because my stomach is so stressed out - bloating, indigestion, upset stomach, etc.  NOTHING sounds good.  The only thing that hasn’t upset my stomach in the past 3 days are fried egg sandwhiches, so I’m stuck with that.  Not that I need to be eating anyhow.

It was an absolute Monday at work - and still is, I’m on-call.  Yay.  My kids’ start school tomorrow, I haven’t chosen what I am going to do for childcare yet.  I have about 12 hrs to figure it out. Read more

My First Blogging Award!! Yay!

So, I came home the other evening, to find that I have been nominated for the Brillante Weblog Premio 2008 Award, by Eric S. who writes “Ruminations of a Small Town Mountain Boy“.  As he states in his post about the 7 people he has nominated, this award is given “for brilliant, happy and interesting blogs with sparkling style”, and was established in 2005.

Read more

My Little Chat With The LLS

So, for those of you that are not familiar with what the LLS is, it is my abbreviation for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society.  The LLS is an awesome advocate for those that have been diagnosed with blood cancers, such as:  Lymphoma, Hodgkin’s Lymphoma, Leukemia and Myeloma.  They are also an awesome resource and offer support to families and friends afflicted with one of these horrible diseases.  On their website, they have a little button near the top of their main page that says “Live Patient Help 10-5 ET”.  Lately, as many of you know because of prior posts, I have been worrying about whether or not MOPP is the best treatment Read more

Trouble in Tahiti…?

I don’t think there is Trouble in Tahiti, but I did have a conversation with the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society today.  They highly suggested that I received a 2nd opinion, as I may not be being properly treated, as I have been afraid of.  I will post more tonight when I get home, so be on the look out for a new post.  I also need to update on my last Doctor’s Appointment last Friday.  Talk to you soon, I’m off to go take some more Ativan so I don’t freak out the rest of the day!

Grrrr… This is getting aggravating.

The Prednisone is kicking in, and I’m just…ugh!

• I’m fat.  I hit 160 last night.  At least I was back down to 155 by this morning.
• My feet hurt.  No amount of oxycodone is taking it away.
• Even my old “fat clothes” aren’t fitting very well.
• I am getting crankier and crankier.  I am starting to feel my blood boil and nothing is causing it.
• I am tired.  I was awake for 3 hrs last night.  Yay.
• I wonder if my MOPP dosages aren’t high enough.
• I just want to go home and go to bed, but I have to take a lorazepam when I get home, or else I will bite someone’s head off, probably literally.  And then I have to wait for 6 hrs to take my temazepam so I can sleep.
• I’m on-call tonight and REALLY don’t want to be.
• Everything about work is bugging me right now, and for the most part I have no reasons for it to be.
• I’m almost through with my 2nd pot of coffee today.

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